[To read this in Spanish: El test: ser aceptado como un de Chazal.]
Marcilly le Chastel - Jean II's domain
(Crystalised from the gatekeeper's notes in the course of a first-ever visit to Mauritius in 1999)
While I have always known them roughly, the criteria for acceptance as a true “de Chazal” are in day to day use here in Mauritius. This is my understanding of them (and how could I be wrong?):
First of all you must look like a “de Chazal”. Basically that means you must have two reasonably parallel and adequately spaced eyes, a finely shaped but generous nose, a firm chin (rounded or square according to your sub-branch), at least one ear, a loud and authoritarian voice, and, if you have a tail it should be concealed. Detailed examination should convince the examiner that you look like her/him. My son Philip once failed a test because he has very curly hair, leading another de Chazal to ask him what sort of savage he might be. I personally have managed to pass all tests so far, though not without the occasional "You look like a de Chazal but ..........". I have experienced some amusing incidents after agreeing to meet a previously unknown relation on a street corner on the basis that we will each recognise the other because he/she looks like a de Chazal. Try walking up to a young woman waiting hopefully in a mini-skirt outside a hotel in Rio and saying that she must be the person you are looking for because she looks like a de Chazal!
Second you must pass the test of de Chazal sanity. You must know that you are the sanest of all people and that there is a high probability that most others are not sane at all. How many can boast of having been in possession of enough weapons to take over a country, and then of throwing them away? And talking of throwing away, how many have discarded a fortune by investing it in Czarist war bonds, not because one gave a damn about the Czar, but because one wanted 25% interest on the money (as a safe income to fund a love of horse racing)? There are almost as many instances of this sort of determination as there are de Chazals. One shuns capitalism, another works with the World Bank, another sees Buddhists as the mainstay of his Catholic flock, another paints butterflies but flatly refuses to do the same for women, and yet another does paint women, literally and with remarkable results.
Thirdly you must pass the test of de Chazal confidence. If you are questioned about your actions you must be able to say “but I am a de Chazal”. Such as when you are walking naked in the street, or driving on the abnormal side of the road or roundabout (I can’t say the wrong side: a de Chazal is always right!), or demanding to be heard in the House of Parliament, or ambling in tattered clothes on the beach Club Med reserves for really important people.
Fourthly you must be able to convince your examiner (who is of course a true de Chazal although going by some other family name for the current generation) that you know more about something than she/he does. Perhaps this explains the number of doctors, lawyers, economists, sugar engineers and non-conformist Swedenborgians in the family. Collectively the de Chazals and their surrogate families the Mayers and the Rouillards constitute a super race, probably descended from extra-terrestrial aliens, duty bound to take the lead, set the example. Only a de Chazal can challenge another de Chazal, and, if there is a dispute as to the outcome, only God can make the final judgement - but She/He will have to draw the jury from true de Chazals.
The gatekeeper admits to appearing several times in the above exultation of de Chazals, but he has allowed this to happen only as a defence should certain other family members protest at their inclusion, all of which was merely intended in a spirit of fun.
Evenor's back garden at the Mauritian La Sablonniere
The pictures are intended simply to illustrate a degree of non-conformism in de Chazal habitats.